Lately I've been stuck imagining
What I wanna do and what I really think
Time to blow out


Lagu Britney ni asyik menyanyi je dalam kepala aku dan dengan tak semena-mena aku pun ternyanyi jugak. Takde la harapan sangat aku nak mengupdate blog ni tapi macam harus la aku membuatnya. Tangan aku gatal nak menaip ni hah. Pening kepala aku beberapa minggu ni, banyak sangat pulak menda yang buat aku stress down. Aku yang hampir okay dari kegilaan ni ase macam nak mental balik dah. Tapi aku ikut je apa takdir aku, orang putih cakap Just Go with The Flow. Harapan aku takde la besar sangat, cuma nak berjaya dalam hidup je. Err, apakah tulisan aku ini sangat menyedihkan pulak. Next lane please.

Aku skodeng BIGBANG punya performance, yang latest la. Dorang punya ALIVE TOURm besttt.. Tapi dapatkah aku pergi? Macam tak dapat, memang rasa nak menangis okay. Tapi takpe, aku dah mampu menghadapinya denga tenang, cuma masih lagi berharap dapat pergi.. Jealous tau kat korang yang dapat gi, ishh.. Selain daripada tu GD dah prepare untuk album solo terbaru, TOP ada drama terbaru, yang lain dengan aktiviti masing-masing. Harap-harap lepas TOP siapkan drama, dia buatla satu album solo ye..Lagu, Turn It Up, Oh Mom, Of All Day, HELLO, I wish more from him..Sape kata dia takleh nyanyi solo, okay je..btw time dia nyanyi lagu No Diggity, aku rasa dia boleh nyanyi, it just kenapa dia tak buat satu album solo? Urmmm, dah takde dah kot.
Well I'm not going to write the story here because if you want to know how the story is you need to buy the book, OF COURSE. The main concern of my writing is to make a review or simply said/ or written is personal reflection. I've only got the chance to read this novel last month (right after I bought it) and finished it last three days. Honestly, I have been struggling to find this book with the cover of cards but ends up buying with a cover of something else and with another publisher. (I was looking for Harper's publisher). Well, here in KB there are not lots of English novel. Even the previous Malay novel is hard to find (I'm talking about Ahadiat's book here). 

Straight to the point, I love Cecelia's writing. Proudly said I have all of her collection and my first book is If You Could See Me Now (my ultimate favourite). I honestly said her books, her stories relates me, relates my life, affect my feelings because every time I read hers I feel like she is writing about how I feel, and every time I read hers I also feels like 'hey that's my stories' that I always wants to put in a paper but I don't have the time to do it yet. Cecelia always give the feelings of extraordinary which I don't really founds in others book. She gave the pure grieving in the characters and develop them in a way which I really understand how it feels. Loneliness is devastating, miserable. Yeah, people will say that. But sometimes they didn't realize there are a lot of feelings include in the loneliness itself. P/S I LOVE YOU told me that, If You Could See Me Now told Me That. For some people, pure happiness is when she/he found someone, pure happiness is when they have a perfect life, and etc. The real things is if you care and loves yourself more than everything, that is the happiness. Take chances but believe in faith. But never think to see the hero or heroin in the character in Cecelia's book to live together. It is life she is talking about, not a drama. 

Holly Kennedy suits my type. When I read about her I found me in her. She has the grieving of losing half of her soul, her other part of her life. I have that feeling either. Holly have been inseparable in her everyday life with Gerry. Her life is all about Gerry and she loves the way it is. She never be alone, and ALWAYS with Gerry. It's hard isn't it when all of sudden, abruptly, someone who is part of your life gone, someone who always told you everything what to do gone, someone who are always taking care of you GONE. At the first page in this book, I cried. Every words makes me cry. It feels like I'm reading myself. The first feeling when someone is gone, it is like that. Neglected, abundance, alone, isolate, all of this will take part and Holly did too. But she is too strong to act like nothing happened in front of others, definitely not me. But when she learns to live again, she has Sharon, Denise, Jack, Helen and Mom. Well, I definitely have my Sharon, Denise, Jack, and Helen either, unfortunately I don't have the Mom. Every character represent the character that happened in my life, and I was shocked. Reminiscing again, this story is written before my time of grieving. This story is a good story to read, a hope to the lost, a kind of motivation story. I implore people who lost their hopes, people who sad because life is not fair, people who lost someone they love so much to read this book. You will find life when you read it, it is not a drama story, it is about a life story.

Holly Kennedy never fails me to relate with her. "Chocoholic?". I laugh at the chapter where she was at the newsagent to buy paper, and resulting herself by buying every newspaper there. Surely it will take time to count the bill, then once again Holly make her moves, take a big chocolate bar, add to the count, well she is Holly ;p Making trouble without intention, she is Holly. I love her. Honestly when she say chocoholic I laugh, who knows Holly is also a chocoholic like me? Not exaggerating here but I am, well most people are, but sorry because this is my self reflection. ^_^ Holly is obviously a timid person, sometimes weird, honest, kind, thoughtful. Again, I love her.

Daniel, Daniel is another person who contribute to Holly step to live on. I like their relationship, till the end. I like how the way it goes. It tells everything in life. The true feeling of soulmate, the kindred spirit, the everything they share and Holly get it all.

P/S: Even I said I implore you to buy this book, but the choice is yours.hehe.

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